I turned 29 today.

Liyen, Premma, Agnes and Jen gave me a surprise by appearing at the back of my gate before 12am. Initially Premma said she need to video call me and Sherlynn to rant about her work and life so when she did video call us at 11.50pm, I was like 'why are you in the dark?!' Padahal, she is outside my house. 

When I looked at them making a huge siew pau for me and Agnes bought Madeleine cake for me, I thought for myself 'I must have done something right to earn this friendship.' I mean, at this age, just by receiving a birthday message via Whatsapp I would feel very happy already, what more to say freshly baked siew pau and showing up physically. I may have lost my job and a man, but I still own something: parents and friends.

My business partner, Ilah, also reminded me to treat myself something good today. That's so heartwarming.

It's all these little things count.

What did that man do? Nothing, he just bought a secret recipe cake and sent it to my house. That's it. No message, no phone call, no nothing. Well, screw him. It doesn't hurt me as much anymore now. When his name was mentioned, my heart doesn't ache and I can breath normally now. I think I healed myself quite well. What doesn't kill me, really does make me a little bit stronger. I can't believe I used to think I can't live without him. I mean, look at me now, I'm even better than before.

I'm really thankful for my friends. I may not have many friends but they are real and they are always there for me. There is this one night I felt really down and I told Sherlynn I dont know how to live my life anymore. Even though it's midnight, she still takes the time out to talk with me but I feel bad because she has work tomorrow. They are like the bouncer that allows me to fall freely and not hurting myself. I am blessed to have them. I can't believe my true friends are found after I start working. I busted a myth that says your true friends are the one from school, once you enter the real world, you can't get real friends anymore. Well, I proved them wrong. Ironically, my school friends are the one that didn't last at all.

29. The last number before 30. You know what, I am going to try a lot of new things at this age. Starting my own business is just one. I have a lot more to come. I'm not going to waste this year like how I wasted my 7 years on a man.